The only good handle is a bone handle.

Too old to be innocent, 
to be sheltered, 
to be carefree and without responsibility.
Too young to have freedom, 
to be listened to and taken seriously.. 
I hate this in between, 
neither here nor there, 
not a carefree child anymore, 
not a free adult yet.


Wow, my followers really shot up while I wasn't looking, hey if I'm not following you back feel free to nag me about it lol I lose track, adhd and all, can't remember shit (literally, I used to forget I had to go the bathroom, well still do sometimes if I don't get the chance to right away, but man that was baad when I was little xD tmi, aaaanyways) nagnagnag, I know I need it! 

So, first of the month. I had a bad day yesterday, not really terrible, but around 700 cal when I was supposed to be >300, at least it was all healthy stuff, except the pizza >.< I used the energy to exercise, so I don't feel teribad. Still.. meh.

I'm going to stay under 300 every day this month, I'm going to plan every fucking bite and there will be NO deviating or I swear I'm going to cut the fuck out of myself.
I WILL learn to say no.
Fucking pizza, why the hell did I acccept the fucking pizza?? >.<
It rained the other day.. didnt even have the decency to snow and look pretty for awhile before it turned into mud. No, it rained. If there is any weather I hate more than snow or hail it's cold fucking rain.
I've been very very cold recently.. Right now my toes are cold >.< its annoying. I wish hot tea would warm my toes somehow.
So.. I was supposed to be riding up to Chicago to visit Matt the first weekend of January with my friend M who would be driving since I don't have a licence.. yeah, nope. She is no longer going. Know how I found out? Asked her how much gas money I needed to give her. WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU NOT TELL ME ABOUT CANCELING PLANS I'M INVOLVED IN????? Matt says he will come pick me up if he has to, but... its about 10 hours for a round trip... I don't want to make him do that... 20 hours of driving in one weekend? :(
So I'm trying to figure out if I can take a train. I have a friend who will drive me up there, I just don't know yet WHERE there is, I don't know what time and I don't know how much it will cost. I also have no idea how to figure this out because the stupid internet is being stupid and confusing.
fml